A sign from above perhaps, a small vivid blue bird that was quite unlike anything Gabi had ever see landed steps in front of her, chirping happily. A wondrous smile graced Gabi’s lips as she watched it hop onto her left shoe and peck gently at her. She let out a soft laugh, and the bird flew away just as quickly as it had appeared. And Gabi knew then…she knew that this was what was meant to be, and she would meet the challenges that arose in the next few years with an open heart because she had Antonio’s love, and that would never leave her.
 
 
 

“Ricardo?” Gabi whispered as she knocked on the open door of the loft. She found him sitting on the bed; his shoulders slumped over dejectedly as he studied something. Peering over his shoulder, she saw that he held a picture of his brother in his hands. Her heart went out to him as she rested a hand on his shoulder. He must not have heard her words, because he was startled to feel her touch. “Oh Ricardo…” Her heart ached for him. He missed his brother so much.

“Gabi?” He stood quickly, rubbing a clenched fist over his red rimmed eyes.

“You’re tired, Ricardo, and you’re losing weight. You should be taking care of yourself.” Gabi said, in a chastising voice.

“Gabi…” Ricardo said again, not believing what was before him. This was just about the first time she had said more than two words to him almost three months. “What…why are you…Gabi, what’s going on?”

“Ricardo…” She took his hand and smiled, already her eyes watering. “We need to talk…about a lot of things. I’m sorry I closed you out before, but I needed time to myself, to think…things have happened. Things that you need to know about. Things I need to tell you.”

“Okay…” Ricardo nodded, looking at her. “I understand that. But…Gab, I don’t understand why I couldn’t have helped you. I mean, you ‘n T were close and all that…and he did…die…” Ricardo choked out the word as Gabi fought back tears. “’Cause he was there…to rescue you, when the building caved in…but I could have helped you.”

“Ricardo…” She rested a hand on his chest, partly to show him that there were still limits, and partly to reassure herself that he was there. That he wouldn’t leave…like Antonio… Shaking her head, Gabi tried to ban the haunting thoughts from her mind. “We’ll talk about this later, okay?” She reached up and kissed him softly on the cheek. “Let me make something to eat, okay? You look like you could use a good meal, and I’m starving.”

He watched her from the bed as she busied herself preparing sandwiches for the two of them. He had never seen her quite this radiant before. The smile she offered seemed to jump out at him, her skin glowed and she had actually…well, he couldn’t believe it, but she had put on a little wait. It made her even more beautiful, he had always complained that she was too thin. He wanted to hold her, he wanted to badly, but he remembered what had happened last time…

It had been a week after the cave in, two days after Antonio’s funeral. Ricardo and Gabi both had been hurting, and he had assumed she would turn to him, her boyfriend. He had been going to try and help them both heal by asking her to marry him. On Valentines Day, he had kissed her and then popped the question. Gabi had turned away from him, and told him in a frigid voice that she couldn’t, and would never be able to be his wife. Of course, Ricardo hadn’t given up, but soon Gabi had made it perfectly clear that she had no interest in being Mrs. Ricardo Torres.

And now…she was back. He brought himself out of the painful reverie as Gabi set a plate with a stack of sandwiches on it down in front of him. “Eat.” She ordered, and Ricardo obediently polished off the first one. He hadn’t had much of an appetite, but somehow knowing that Gabi had made this for him made it more appealing.

 Gabi nibbled on hers delicately, and spoke. “Ricardo, I don’t know how you’re going to react to what I have to tell you, but I know you probably won’t be thrilled. I just want you to know that I do care for you, and a lot.” She touched his hand tenderly. “I’m sorry if this hurts you. That’s never what I meant do.”

“What is it, Gabi?” He set the food down. “Just tell me.”

“Ricardo…” She didn’t know where to begin. “Some things happened in the cave-in, things that changed my life. And even some things before the cave-in. Things between…Antonio and me.”

“Between you and Antonio?” Ricardo repeated, not understanding.

“Ricardo… we were more than friends.” She looked down at her hands, subconsciously resting on her stomach. “I loved him, Ricardo.”

He was shocked. No, not shocked…somehow, he had always suspected there was something more than friendship between them, but he had never imagined it would evolve into passion, or love. He waited for Gabi to go on.

“In the cave-in…we thought we were going to die…” A lonely tear trailed down her cheek. “And in a way we did…part of me died with Antonio… but part of me lived. And part of Antonio still lives.” Gabi impatiently wiped away a tear and then took Ricardo’s hand. “I’m pregnant. It’s Antonio’s child.” She said, and waited for his response.

Ricardo was a little overwhelmed. He pulled his hand away from hers and stood up. “Aw…Gabi… I don’t know what to say…”

“You need time, I understand that.” Gabi stood up as well and headed towards the door. “I’m still staying at Surf Central…maybe you could stop by some time. I want my son to know his family.”

“Son?” Ricardo couldn’t help but be curious.

“Just a feeling…” Gabi shrugged sadly, then walked away. Ricardo watched her leave and tried not to notice the tugging in his heart to go after her.
 
 
 
 

Two months later, Gabi sat on the couch at Surf Central pouring over the photo albums Maria had gotten for her from her mother. The pictures of Antonio as a baby delighted Gabi. She knew her child would be just as adorable as his father was. All of her roommates and most of her friends knew now the situation she was in. She felt that she owed it to her child and to Antonio that people know whose child she was having, but everyone had agreed to keep quiet to others, people that weren’t as close to Gabi. No one from the church knew. The last thing Gabi wanted was to destroy the memories his parishioners had of him as a priest. His vocation had been as much a part of him as their love.

A knock on the door interrupted her nostalgic thought, and she rose to answer it, hands resting on her well-rounded stomach. No one else was home, so she had the house to herself. “Ricardo!” She exclaimed, surprised. Almost as surprised as he had been to see her the day before.

“Hey Gabi…” Ricardo said cautiously. He glanced down at what she had been so involved in looking at. A wide grin broke out on his lips when he saw the picture of Antonio as a toddler, unclothed and standing proudly by the toilet. “Aw, I ain’t looked at those in a long time. You get ‘em from Maria?”

Gabi nodded, pleased that he didn’t seem to hate her at least. “Maybe…we can look at them together, later?” She suggested, and Ricardo nodded thoughtfully.

“Hopefully, we’ll have time to do a lotta stuff like that together.” He gave her a deep look and then smiled.

“What…what do you mean, Ricardo?”

“I mean I don’t want you raisin’ this kid alone.” He took a seat on the couch and motioned for Gabi to join him. “Tell ya the truth…if T hadn’t died and I found about what you two did, then I would probably hate you both. But…T’s gone, an’ I can’t hate him…aw hell, what am I sayin’. I couldn’t hate T whether he was dead or not. But I woulda been angry. Now…I’m not. Hurt, a little betrayed, but not too angry. And like I said, I don’t want you raisin’ my brother’s child alone.”

Ricardo took a deep breath and charged on. “Gab, I know you don’t love me like ya love him, but I do know that part of ya does love me. And I want to be with you. I love you, Gabi. Nothin’ could change that, not now, not ever.”

“I love you, too, Ricardo. Really, you’ve been so kind to me…but…”

“I know, I know. Antonio has your heart, but…Gab, Antonio isn’t here. As painful as it is, Antonio won’t ever be here again. This kid’s gonna need a father, Gabi. I want to be there for him. And for you.”

“I don’t know if I can do that, Ricardo…” Gabi turns away, tears threatening her.

“I know it won’t be easy, and I’m not saying things have to fall back just like they were in the beginning, but I want you to give me a chance. Let me be your friend, and we’ll see how things go from there. Okay?” He reached out to wipe away a tear from her face as she smiled shakily.

“Friends…okay. I think I can handle that.” Gabi placed her hand in his and leaned into his warm, welcomed embrace. The past months had been so lonely… it felt good to know she would have someone to lean on from now on.
 
 
 
 

FOUR YEARS LATER

“Oh Gabi, I’m so happy for you!” Meg Evens gushed as she hugged Gabi close to her. “I always knew that you two would end up together.”

“Thanks, Meg.” Gabi smiled and politely but determinedly directed herself away from the crowd. Looking around, worry fluttered in her chest when she couldn’t find what she was looking for.

“Hey, babe, it’s okay. He’s playin’ with Trey outside.” Ricardo walked up behind her and gently rubbed her shoulders. Gabi relaxed immediately. “You know, you worry about him too much.”

Gabi turned around and smiled as he kissed her softly on the lips. “I know…I just couldn’t go on if anything happened to him.”

“T would be proud.” Ricardo commented, staring at his beautiful bride. She looked like an angel with her dark hair falling gracefully around her shoulder, setting off the sparkling white of her wedding dress.

“Thank you…” Gabi whispered. They had long ago come to an understanding. Gabi would love Ricardo as best she could, and accept his love as long as he understood that Antonio would always be first in her heart.

“Momma!” A dark haired three-year-old ran in on wobbly legs and reached his arms up to Gabi, who leaned down and grabbed him, hoisting him into the air before letting him come to rest on her hip. “Momma, I want cake!”

Gabi’s eyes sparkled as she grinned and gazed into his melted chocolate eyes. Eyes he had inherited from his father. “But don’t you want to wait and see what kind of goodies Aunt Maria has for you?”

Ricardo laughed at the way his nephew’s eyes lit up. “Let me take him, Gabi. I think everyone’s about ready to head on over to Maria’s for the reception anyway. We’ll wait here while you to go see him, okay?”

Gabi felt so blessed with Ricardo’s love. He understood that it was important she go to Antonio’s grave, even now, after finalizing her bond with Ricardo.  She handed her son over to him, and set out to the cemetery, which was right behind St. Joseph’s.

“Antonio…” Her eyes watered as she stood next to the headstone. “Hi. I just wanted to let you know that the wedding went fine. Your mother didn’t burst in with a gun or anything.” She laughed softly. “I love you, Antonio. You know I always will. “ She paused, then continued. “Tony’s doing fine. He’s more like you every day. He’s such a sweet little boy… like his Daddy. Ricardo’s going to take care of us. I know you would have wanted that. I do love him…he’s a wonderful man…but he’s not you, Antonio. He’ll never be.” A tear slipped down her face. “I love you.” She knew that she had to go, she couldn’t be late for the reception. “I’ll come back to see you soon, okay?” She kissed two fingers and placed them on top of the headstone.

She knew that wherever Antonio was now, he was looking down on her with pride in his eyes. She was going to do everything in her power to keep it that way for the rest of her life.